and by the time it’s boiled, you’ll have read this!
It’s January, which is a time for new things, and I’ll be writing a regular (and short!) blog with a focus on emotional wellbeing and thinking about how we can support ourselves and each other. I’d like to think that you will give yourselves a few minutes every now and again to sit down, have a cup of something that you like and take a breath.
It’s not been the best start to the year and I imagine lots of you were hoping for a different time over the festive period to the one we actually had. This means that there can be a whole range of emotions triggered from disappointment and loss to anger and frustration and maybe even relief.
Often, we think of emotions as positive and negative. We try to avoid the ones that are uncomfortable and difficult. Emotions exist to guide us, though. They give us information about what is going on and sometimes just naming them when we feel them, accepting that they are there can be better than trying to ignore them.
Hello sadness. I see you.
Imagine you are talking to someone you care about deeply. Would you want them to hide and dismiss their feelings? Or would you speak to them kindly and tell them that you understood why they might be feeling that way? It may seem obvious, but we often don’t treat ourselves as someone we care about deeply. And yet, you are the most important person in your life.
When we are compassionate to ourselves, we accept our feelings when we notice them. This doesn’t mean that we have to act on them or hold onto them, but we are allowed to have feelings.
We might ask ourselves what do I need right now? Sometimes we don’t know, sometimes we have to look back to what has helped in the past, what has got us through.
When we are kind to ourselves, both outwardly by taking care of our needs and inwardly by speaking to ourselves with compassion, we also help those around us to do the same.
So remember to be kind, monitor that voice inside and remind it that you are important and will do better with gentleness and compassion.
Post by Fiona Holliday. Find out more about our therapy services here.